I sometimes sit and ponder, For all the lost souls whom left this world too soon. Did they see something we could not? A truth of which, once upon learning, They can never fully turn their backs upon again? Or was their path to move forward so destroyed, That life, as they knew … Continue reading Train Of Suicidal Thoughts
Understanding the meaning of life Is a knowledge best left unspoken. To find the true meaning in ones self, Is to allow the restless night To engulf the sun's weary light. It's silly really.... I've always been a restless little creature, Flitting around here and there. Wandering aimlessly in the dark. Not knowing … Continue reading Burdens That You Carry
I try not to open my eyes, Because the thought of everything is too hard to see. I can shut out the world this way.... Including everyone I have ever loved, And everyone that has ever loved me. I've become one with my darkness. It has a gentle caress, That can ease me to sleep. … Continue reading My darkness, My friend. (Poetry of Mania)
Words seem to be at a standstill for the moment. Caught just between my heart and my mind. For all of those out there who may suffer.... You are not alone. Depression creeps up on you quietly. "At the very beginning, you start to struggle with a lot of things, but...you usually just ignore them. It's like … Continue reading Depression creeps up on you quietly.
Depression leaves you totally exhausted and disconnected from reality. I was writing everyday until, suddenly the "light bulb went out". Just as quickly; I turned into mush. All I wanted to do was lay and sleep in bed all day/night, with my sleeping pills. I could no longer formulate words. They just sat in a big … Continue reading Waiting…
When your alone, in the dark, locked up inside a place you don't want to be....you try to find meaning. You try to find hope. You try to find hope anywhere and everywhere. You start looking in places you never even knew existed before. Before all of this suffocating darkness found you. You'll dig into … Continue reading ~*That Dark Place*~
Sometimes, our own worst enemy can be just fragmented pieces of an overactive mind. Figments of our very own imagination. The angel sitting on one shoulder.....while the devil is laughing on the other. For all the moments that I'm left with this quiet/loud mind of mine.....I ponder at times, if I will go insane. And if so, how long will it take. Food for … Continue reading Food for thought, for the “worried” mind.
For when you fear that the darkness will swallow you whole and when you feel that you possibly can't go on anymore.... "What the devil is the point of surviving, going on living, when it's a drag? But you see, that's what people do."- Alan Watts Time length: 3:55 https://youtu.be/uJStjV4HkSE
"We don't seek the painful experiences that hue our identities. But we seek our identities, in the wake of painful experiences. We cannot bare a pointless torment. But we can endure a great pain, if we believe that it is purposeful." “Ease makes less of an impression on us than struggle. We could have been ourselves … Continue reading “How the worst moments in our lives, can make us who we are”.
As many of you know, I suffer from severe depression. Along my journey with depression, I've somehow accumulated a new disorder, although not diagnosed from a professional (even though it doesn't take a genius for this one). I suffer horribly from Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD) and haven't left the house in many months. Not even … Continue reading